Yesterday evening listening to FM 933心情小抽屉
A story shared which I can totally relate such feelings
Can't help it and broke down into tears
Took awhile to finally calm down
And I wrote mine briefly not to add too much of details
But the editor wrote back for me to add more
Taking it as a diary entry I wrote back
With more emotions, I teared while writing
With more details, I reminisce those memories

Letting go may take awhile for me
Let's not say moving on
For now, just focus on working hard and earn more for the future.
Need to be more independent.
Need to be a lot more stronger.
Need to learn to love myself.

Till then

Removed the past more than hundred posts I wrote over less than 3 months.
As I read and removed
Realized how clingy I got
All those feelings are what I will need to let go
It hit me that hard because I committed too deep into it
I will pick up all my pride back together
I will come back stronger

Till then.


PS:
Even if we're not together, I want things to be going good for you.
I don't care if we're supposed to never speak again.
I want you to smile again, even if it's not with me.
And I guess you found it.

Had been long since I last blogged
Had some ME time without any social media in my daily life
I know I had been escaping the truth all these while
And yesterday it just got worst
Couldn't sleep at all
Thus today the zombified mode
Perhaps he had moved on
But I am still waiting
Many times I scolded myself for being this stubborn
Slapped myself with all the hardest truth
Even my last pride I didn't save it for myself
The things he might not know
Created the blog https://newchapterbegins141018.wordpress.com to pen down every ups and down we share which I hoped when we looked back are fond memories.
Whenever he said he love me more, deep down I know I love him even more
When I said he is sticky, I know it is because I stick to him
Always wanted our photos to be taken and posted, yet I thought you might find it annoying
I know I am not good at cooking like he does, I watched video clips and practice on the basics
I know I lack in communication, I read up books when I am on my way to work while he is still sleeping

Now.
The promises he made, became empty promises that hit me hard.
The places we went, the things we did, became flashbacks that hurts.
Perhaps he had found someone better, someone who suits him more, I wish the best for you.
Though I gotten deeper into depression, I hold on my tears to blog about it.
A day I guess hefound someone.
Till then.